I used to hide the body behind baggy shirts and xxxxxl hoodies when I gained a lot of weight again. Disliked (and afraid) to go outside and just wanted to cancel all (fun) events to distance myself from others, because I was (am) too scared of them for what they might see or think (of me, the body, the weight gain) and the fear of being judged. I also thought I just didn’t deserve to do or have nice things.
But I’m starting to learn to love myself more and getting more peace with the body. (By so trying to make more effort for putting on nice clothes for example.)
I had a nasty core belief that I was unloveable and just not worth it when I was (or am) overweight. That nobody would like my presence around them when I’m like this. (Feeling disgusted, worthless, thinking you’re not (good) enough, etc.) I thought everyone was thinking the same about me as I thought about myself. (Uhh.. Yeah, if that makes sense?) But those inner critics that gives you negative self-talk thinks it’s protecting you by keeping you safe and out of trouble. I’m trying to learn to hear and catch these negative judgments, so I can change it up to a supportive, positive voice instead.
Also learning more about different parts and their needs/feelings. Because some parts are feeling safer and invisible when the body is bigger, while others are feeling the exact opposite!
I’m learning to accept the body for how it is. Your weight doesn’t define your self-worth. The problem isn’t with your body, the problem is what you think of it… And what you think of yourself. Nasty core beliefs… I have a lot of them. Can you recognize your core beliefs? I am curious about what yours are. Let me know in comment section below!